spah: (don't worry boys)
Engineer | Dell Conagher ([personal profile] spah) wrote in [community profile] prismatica2020-07-13 11:41 am

[VIDEO] un: conagher

[Engineer's metal fingers pull away from the screen where he's propped up his device. He's currently sitting on a boat not far from Crystal Beach's shore. Waves lap against the boat, a splash can be heard here and there, and that light caw of seagulls?? Perfect. Peaceful.

Until this Texan motherfucker, dressed like Tom Selleck with the shorts and chest hair to match, brings a fucking antique coach gun into view and starts loading it in his lap.]


I been here about a year now, since the beginning 'a things, and I ain't got good memories of the Vulpus Astra Celebration comin' up. [He glances up from the gun.] So, uh. If anyone plans on goin' to Amehagara, keep with somebody. Hell, I'll chaperone ya if y'need somebody.

[There's a splash off camera, like something jumping out of the water. Engie quickly lifts the gun up over the water and shoots. A pause passes, and from the distance you can hear somebody shout "HOLY SHIT MAN JUST USE A FISHING POLE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE".]

Careful with the super bass, by the way. They like to jump.

[... and, after a pause, Engie scratches at his beard.]

Also, uh... I been growin' bluebonnets in that new community garden, by the way. Been real nice, bein' able to get back to my farmboy roots. [He smiles slightly.] Wound up growin' too much, though. So if anybody's interested in some hand-tied flowers, y'all lemme know.

[Another splash. Engie shoots again, lightning-fast.

"MAN COME ON"]
terribletwos: (want a moment to be real)

[personal profile] terribletwos 2020-07-27 12:25 am (UTC)(link)
they can't be that smart if they don't swim away when they hear gunshots.