prismatica | UN: G.Akechi | Early afternoon

There's about never not a chance the other person hasn't felt out their own comfort zone yet. Only way to do that is trial and error.

's fair, kid. But it sure doesn't sound to me like you're the problem here, so why do you think you are?

[There's no response for a little while...before he switches over to a private message.]

My mother was the mistress of a selfish and flat out evil man. He regularly abuses his power to disregard women's desires, and doesn't care if he hurts them in the process.

I've only known him directly for a few years, but I grew up knowing what kind of person my biological father is.

Congratulations for taking him as an example of what not to do. But if you're terrified to ask if what you want is all right by the other person, you're taking it too far in the other direction. Pretty clear to me that you know where the lines are.

And what if being less cautious leads to overstepping? As much as I hate to admit it, I'm already fairly...dirty minded, when I let myself be.

Local human has functioning sex drive, film at eleven. Local testosterone-driven teenager, even. Kind of comes with the territory.

You're not likely to overstep, having seen how poorly it can go for everyone else. You're also not so entitled as to lose sight of that.

You also avoid eating because terrible people need food to sustain them?

Food is a biological necessity. Even here, sex is an optional indulgence.

But when the terrible person is your own biological parent, it's easy to worry about what you might have inherited from him.

Still. Doesn't mean you can't indulge responsibly just because an unfortunate relation did so to excess.

You might be better off asking someone who has more traditional family structures as a frame of reference, there, but I can definitely say genetics aren't everything. Case in point, the Antichrist, actually. Told Lucy to his face he wasn't his dad just because he sent him into the world.

That...actually sounds a lot like me with my father. He refused to acknowledge me, and left my mother to struggle on her own, so I've been plotting against him since before we met. Us being related doesn't mean I owe him anything but a lesson in responsibility.

But, rejecting any kind of filial obligation doesn't mean you can be sure you haven't inherited any undesirable traits.

Can't say I blame you for wanting to get one over on him, but... you sure you have as much of an edge as you think you do? He's definitely had more time to work on his fallback plans, just by virtue of being older and more ruthless.

We're back to responsibility and excess. You've seen where his excess got everyone he trampled on and you don't like it. That doesn't mean you're doomed to the same problem.

If you really don't want to be like him, don't kick him while he's down. Take him down a few pegs, certainly, but let that be enough.

That...depends on whether or not I can act on what I've learned here when I get home. According to people from further along the timeline than me, he had caught on to my plans. But that means that if I try something else, and move earlier than he thinks I will, I'll ruin his counter plan.

He took everything from my mother. What I truly want is for him to know the suffering he's inflicted on others, and to never be able to hurt anyone else ever again.

That. That right there is what you need to be watching yourself for. Take him down right and the suffering will take care of itself. What do you gain from rubbing it in his face after that?

The satisfaction of seeing him understand exactly what he was doing to others. It's too late for him to apologize to her, but he can at least get an object lesson in what he has to be sorry for.

And if he gains the satisfaction of knowing you're just like him after all, in the ways that will do the most long-term damage?

Trust me, kid, I've seen this kind of thing go pear-shaped a lot.

I would never willingly do that kind of thing to someone who doesn't deserve it. Isn't that an important difference?

Use your power the way he does, maybe not. But if you're so sure you know what someone who wronged you deserves, and they find their way to genuine remorse for fucking up, how do you know where to draw the line?

You know where the line is with sex, that much is clear. But I think you don't know where the line is with revenge, and that's the one you've really got to watch out for.

Take him down a few pegs and let that be enough, or you'll be down at the bottom of an even worse slippery slope than casual flirtation.

The only way I can imagine someone like him having remorse is if it was forced on him.

Ah. Kind of person who does my job for me. [There's no 'all but does' to it, the amount of times Crowley's taken or received credit for something that was entirely humanity's invention. The only reason he's not sure the reverse is true for Aziraphale is that would involve Heaven genuinely noticing Good Deeds.]

That's the bugger of free will, though. If he doesn't change, all you're doing is showing him how hard he's won. If he does, it's unnecessary salt in the wound that'll do you more harm than good in the long run.

Whether it's forced on him or not, you don't have to like him any better, just leave him to stew in his own juices.

If he's torn down to nothing, how has he won more than he's lost?

Humans call abuse cyclical for a reason. When you only see one tool to deal with a problem, you solve your problems with it. And this one I can't even say was one of your inventions.

It's Heaven's.

God has been largely absent since Lucy's little snit fit of a Rebellion. If She's still paying any kind of attention, She has a funny way of showing it, which is to say none at all. There's no answer to questions of any kind, and the last time anyone tried asking they got thrown out for their trouble, which doesn't exactly inspire confidence in doing so. So everyone who's left Upstairs is... well. They're winging it, for lack of a better phrase, but they've convinced themselves there's a Plan and rigid adherence to the Plan is the only way forward.

But no one knows what the Plan is. They pass that uncertainty down the chain. Obey orders, but fuck if we're going to tell you what the orders are until you screw up. Aziraphale's the only angel deserving of the name and they treat him like shit for daring to be kind and look out for humanity.

Hell's no better, but they're at least open in their menace. You know it's going to be unpleasant. They make a production out of it, and a lot of it comes from bitterness over how poorly flouncing out or being tossed out, depending on exactly who you ask, went.

Anyway.

I can see where imposed remorse is a troubling idea - you're welcome for the free will, by the way - but arguably, it's the consequence of his previous freely made choices, and he's been more than happy to impose his will on others. Humans tend to call that 'crime.'

How he could win if you take away his power is all down to you. How often has he torn down someone he believes wronged him to nothing? Got another tool in your arsenal to handle what comes after the satisfaction of seeing him squirm a little?

Or are you stuck in the cycle created by him showing you that's the only tool you'll ever need?

[There's...a good long while before he replies. It seems Crowley's given him something to seriously consider.]

'Crime', or 'politics'. Though how much difference there is depends on who you ask.

I don't know how much chance I'll get to show him either way. He's forced me to be complicit in crimes others would be well justified in seeking vengeance of their own for.

[Good. He should think about it.]

Eh, fair.

Okay, so you're looking at jail time of your own, in all likelihood. But by and large, most humans aren't going to go on a bloody revenge rampage. It's too much effort, and besides, they have other tools they can use. Like, oh, I don't know, letting the legal system handle criminals.

What if I get a reduced sentence because of the circumstances, and they aren't satisfied with me getting off lightly? You don't think they'd want to make up the difference if they had the opportunity?

Still more effort than the average person wants to put in, kid. Not to mention, a lot of people won't see the risk of their own jail time as worth whatever reward they might get from killing someone.

[Are there people who might think he wasn't getting the full measure of what he deserves? Quite possibly. But that still doesn't mean they'll take matters into their own hands.]

I've seen plenty of people willing to go to a lot of effort to retaliate for lesser reasons than that.

If it was your sperm donor's idea of friends, you've seen a lot more of the exception than the general rule. Seriously, but for the country they could've given him the Antichrist to raise and got the apocalypse they all wanted so badly.

(The real one ended up with the wrong family - more people than expected at the hospital that night. The guy they wanted on the job... has barely noticed he has a child, a full decade later.)

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Private

okay NOW he'll meet you halfway on the text.

Now that there are no observers to troll?

Exactly!

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